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| pretty little pillow to add some color to my dreary day--I'm loving some half square triangles lately! |
I'm struggling to balance my creative outlets with family life, work, and other obligations. The lack of balance here really has me questioning the why of many thing that I do.
Why do I feel the need to do everything? I'm feeling overwhelmed by my current hobbies of sewing, quilting, cooking, baking and yet I dream of weaving and stained glass. I try not to even think about the hobbies that I neglect, like knitting and soap making! Our garden this year is going to be huge, which means time away from what I want to be doing. Before we even have our little seedlings in the ground, I find myself resenting this intrusion on my time.
I'm constantly raising the decades old question of whether we, as modern women can indeed have it all. While I've never been able to fully discern what having your cake and eating it too really means, I know that I want that cake!!
I was telling a friend recently that I write hundreds of blog posts in my head that never see the light of day. I want to blog more, and yet it seems to be the one thing that I can let slide. I do feel like my creative endeavors have value and merit and should be shared with my online community. I'm sure my incredibly supportive husband would appreciate a break from me constantly showing him what I'm working on.
Thanks for "listening," I needed to get that off my chest! Here's to answering no to someone that wants me to hem their pants. May they understand that just because I have a sewing machine and am lucky enough to have a room dedicated to my crap, that doesn't make me a tailor!
I'm hearing the timer beep on the oven, so I really must go. Once I have the 3 tier cake for 150 people off of my plate maybe I can practice what I preach and not say yes anymore. Once I eat a piece, that is!
I SO can commiserate here! My husband calls this malady "serial hobbies" because I jump from one thing to another rather than trying to keep eight balls in the air. This week it's knitting, next week it's scrapbooking, and after that it's the handsewed baby gown I need to finish before she outgrows the size...etc. All while trying to keep the house somewhat organized, meals on the table, and clean clothing on the backs of a man and three children under five - yes, it is overwhelming.
ReplyDeleteI have found it helpful to keep a list of projects I'm working on, in order of priority, so that when I find that elusive ten minutes to myself, I know instantly what I need to do, rather than default to playing randomly on the computer and doing nothing constructive (although honestly, we all need those kinds of moments, too).
And I keep reminding myself that there will be lots of time for domestic crafts when my kids are out of the house! If I live that long! LOL
Sucks to not be able to do it all, doesn't it? Not sure what's worse: the realization you can't do everything or that you just have to let some things slide. But you do have to prioritize and decide what's REALLY important to you. You probably already know, right?
ReplyDeleteI got my daughter a sewing machine for Christmas a couple of years ago and have been teaching her to sew. I also have a woman at work who is always sending me scrub pants home to mend. I told the daughter its not always a good idea to let people know you sew. They just assume you'd love to do that for them.
ReplyDeleteLove the pillow! I have been loving all the half square triangle projects I have been seeing lately, and it makes me want to cut out some triangles!
ReplyDeleteI am struggling with the same issues, and it is so hard to find balance. Since we can't have more time in the day, something has to give-unfortunately for me right now it is time to sew. I would love to learn how to make stained glass too!
Ah the time old problem that we battle with day in day out. Balance is what is right for you, finding what you love to do, and enjoying the moments you get doing it, accepting the things you must do, and good planning and prioritizing :) Make your choices work for you and you will find balance (with a little gentleness on yourself too) :)
ReplyDeleteSaying no is the hardest thing to do, once you've said it once it empowers you to do it again, go on, give it a go! You'll feel amazing....
ReplyDeleteLizzie
xxx
Feeling the same way my friend. My project for this week totally failed (which you will see evidence of soon), and it can be so disheartening when I worked so hard to even find the time to sew. I think that you do an amazing job of balance (the no thing is a work in progress) and I love sewing with you (and your lip balm is the bomb by the way). I think that we need to get out and have ourselves a beer again, it has already been too long.
ReplyDeleteOh I so know that feeling. For years I never said "no". Now I know that word so well I'm afraid I have swung the entire other way. I think this is all the rhythm of life.
ReplyDeleteI'm not sure that I have any additional comments to add to this discussion, as you know where I'm at with all of this. But I hope you can figure it out. Saying NO feels good. But sometimes saying yes is the right thing to do, too.
ReplyDeleteoh, i love the pillow! you and your HST's. you do so well with them!
ReplyDeleteHow I understand what you mean, a few months ago I found myself sewing 19 costumes for all my son's classmates. In Spain we say that you are "ni pagada, ni agradecida" which means you won't be paid nor thanked and another very good Spanish proverb "más vale una vez colorada que cien amarilla" which can be roughly translated as "better once red than a hundred times yellow" and explained: you better flush once saying no, that get yourself involved in something you don't want for a hundred times.
ReplyDeleteAmen, it is quite the quandary. So many women feel this way. We are complicated creatures, but we rock!
ReplyDeleteOne day you will wake up and find yourself like me with all the time in the world, children grown-up, work finished. It's wonderful having the ability to sit and sew whenever I like, a husband who cooks the meals, etc. but, like me, you will look back with nostalgia to the days when your kids were little and you had six jobs lined up. Don't expect perfection from yourself, allow yourself an hour a day to do whatever you like and if you just feel like doing nothing then take time to watch the flowers grow.
ReplyDeletei completely agree!!
ReplyDeletei meant to leave a comment when you first posted this. but, i don't have any wisdom about finding more balance in life. i'm able to say no, but i have a problem with volunteering for tasks when i see there is a need. i get myself into a mess sometimes....
ReplyDeletemaybe it is more about saying that what we already do is enough?
You are so funny . . . and I know exactly how you feel! I gave up on the garden . . .
ReplyDeleteMan, looks like so many of us are in the same boat it could sink! :)
ReplyDeleteA couple of years ago I made myself commit to just 1 or 2 hobbies a year. If I want to take on a new one I have to put another one away. Right now I'm doing quilting and photography. Though my photography has been neglected. Oh well. Reading, writing, gardening, crocheting, etc., are all on the backburner. For now.
I hope you had that cake, Tara! I know I'm late on catching up on blog posts (ran out of time for what I really wanted to be doing!!!)... Spent the weekend sitting next to your friend, Amanda Jean, and she mentioned your name about 30 times! We discussed many of these things at our blogger retreat....
ReplyDeleteI'm with Doris, everything she said. It was therapeutic learning to know Amanda Jean in real life, along with the others. And she DID mention your name a lot! so I'm seriously thinking about the retreat in November...
ReplyDeleteThere is a time and season for every purpose. For me, I have worked for 33 years and just now am getting back to my crafting roots. Summer is garden time with quilting fitted in as I can. Now I am spending 3 weeks in South Carolina visiting my daughter and granddaughter. Enjoy every moment of your life, it flies by.
ReplyDeleteIf you feel overwhelmed just stop. Pick it back up when you feel like it. There is no rule that says you MUST do everything. Peace.
I hear you! I just found your blog, reading (inbetween fixing family dinner, thinking about the starter I need to make for the bread which I can't bake tomorrow because I'm off to work tomorrow)oh that and feeling guilty because I haven't blogged in ages...eh? Need I say more? I don't have the answer but I do feel and learn with you.
ReplyDeleteI love what Alysgrandma here says, but I'm afraid I make those rules -that I MUST do everything- all by myself haha.